This is not where I am supposed to be
at this moment.
I am approximately two weeks away from
the finishing line of my whole Bachelor in Education journey. I am supposed to be head over heels with my
Academic Exercise and other remaining coursework.
But I am sleepy.
My sleeping time is
all over the place. I was wide awake at 5 am and passed out two hours after
that.
And I am depressed.
Yes, unexplainably
depressed.
Lokman thinks I think too much. I
think him thinking of me thinking too much as a prompt accusation… which of
course I had to agree now.
I am unable to control my strings of
thoughts. But this is not abnormal, really. I talk way too much with Lokman
recently yet I have not much to say to other people. I’d rather listen to them.
Then again, it would be rude if I just keep silent when socializing. When I
tell stories (except to Lokman), my thoughts were disrupted halfway through the
story-telling. And then I couldn’t tell if I was making sense or not.
No, I still don’t think anything is
wrong with me.
Perhaps that explains why I am jolly happy when Lokman comes home or calls me after class. I vent every thing possibly as much as I can. And then, I just go on silent mode.
Poor man. He must be confused. Ha ha. Sorry, though.
I thought maybe I just need a good run. I need a bloody good
run.
But I cannot because of all these
baggage of assignments and essays to do.
I need a bloody good run.
